Ask Grandstander

[Grandstander]

Originally Posted by DiamondDave

Will you be there for creative answers when I run for office in 2010 or 2012?

If you mean creative explanations for why the only vote you received was your own....sure.

[LongtimeBravesFan]

Best on screen performance by someone portraying a character from the Bible?

[Grandstander]

Originally Posted by LongtimeBravesFan

Best on screen performance by someone portraying a character from the Bible?

My personal favorite has always been Edward G. Robinson snarling his way through "The Ten Commandments." He is so far out of place with his NY gangster accent that it is hilarious.

After that, I suppose I liked Harry Dean Stanton as Saul (pre-road to Damascus Paul) in "The Last Temptation of Christ"....who delivers the best line in that film when he asks the ressurected Lazurus "Which is better? Death or life?" The next best line was the answer from Lazurus..."I was a little surprised... wasn't that much difference."

[skrable]

why did the trail of breadcrumbs you left for me to follow send me to costa rica?

[Grandstander]

Originally Posted by skrable

why did the trail of breadcrumbs you left for me to follow send me to costa rica?

Costa Rica? Damn these miscommunications.

COSTCO....you were supposed to go to Costco to pick up some new office furniture.

Well, as long as you are there, you may as well make yourself useful and check on the "offshore" investment accounts.

[John F]

If Music is the melody of life -- what is the song that is playing?

[guy incognito]

This is the first time I've ever dined at Chez Stander. A couple minutes ago I summoned the garçon and inquired as to the components of your "house special", and he got all huffy and agitated and said I should take it up with the management.

What gives?

[Grandstander]

Originally Posted by John F

If Music is the melody of life -- what is the song that is playing?

Okay, wait a sec, everyone hush so I can listen.......

uh huh....uh huh.......okay. I got it.

I think it's "We Gotta Get Out of This Place" by the Animals.

[Grandstander]

Originally Posted by guy incognito

This is the first time I've ever dined at Chez Stander. A couple minutes ago I summoned the garçon and inquired as to the components of your "house special", and he got all huffy and agitated and said I should take it up with the management.

What gives?

We discovered that by adding snotty, huffy waiters and hosts, we could raise the prices by 20 % and not only would no one object, they fully expected it. We had already been able to raise prices by 5 % by adding tassels to the menus, another five percent by having shaped butter patties, which when added to the 5 % we got for the parsley sprigs and five percent for making everyone wait 15 minutes longer to be seated....means business is booming.

[John F]

Originally Posted by Grandstander

Okay, wait a sec, everyone hush so I can listen.......

uh huh....uh huh.......okay. I got it.

I think it's "We Gotta Get Out of This Place" by the Animals.

Weird. Every time I meditate and listen to the sounds of existence, I start hearing the refrain from "Yellow Submarine" To each his own perchance?

That or I gotta get my ears checked.

[skrable]

How will the New York Yankees right the ship and get back on track?

[jtur88]

Which of the following adjectives best describes your overall take on the world we live in?
---Angry
---Indignant
---Cynical
---Sarcastic
---Pragmatic

[Grandstander]

Originally Posted by skrable

How will the New York Yankees right the ship and get back on track?

They need to make a deal with Jeter to purchase exclusive rights to his intangibles radiations. Jeter, as is his right under the most recent MLBPA agreement, has been selling his intangible aura to teammates who were able to meet his price. For example, last season Arod and Matsui refused to meet his price, so Jeter withheld his aura from them and....well, we all know what happened. This season Arod wised up and bought the complete deluxe intangibles program, however, Mariano Rivera foolishly decided to try and get by without it.

The problem of course is that Jeter's intangibles are his property and any attempt by the Yankees to seize them as a club asset would be bitterly resisted by the MLBPA. So, I do not see that they have any option but to purchase the intangibles and distribute them as they see fit in association with the needs of the team.

[Grandstander]

Originally Posted by jtur88

Which of the following adjectives best describes your overall take on the world we live in?
---Angry
---Indignant
---Cynical
---Sarcastic
---Pragmatic

I'll own up to the bottom three on your list, none of which are more dominant than the other. While I do indeed have the sociopath's basic personality, I am absent the Twin G's portfolio that gives we sociopaths a bad name....A Grudge and a Gun.

Anger and indignation are ephemeral emotions and come into play only when reacting to some immediate stimuli. The moment the cause is removed, those emotions evaporate for me. I'd make a lousy mobster because I'm not the vendetta sort.

[LongtimeBravesFan]

Do you have a prediction for the Survivor winner? You've said before this year's group is rather lame, has survivor jumped the shark?