Ask Grandstander

[Mugthis]

If Gore won the U.S. presidency in 2000, would he be exiting his post as the leader who brought the world peace, made everyone rich, and spurred the creation zero-emission vehicles fueled by H20?

[Grandstander]

Originally Posted by Mugthis

If Gore won the U.S. presidency in 2000, would he be exiting his post as the leader who brought the world peace, made everyone rich, and spurred the creation zero-emission vehicles fueled by H20?

Maybe. Or he might have been the guy exiting his post after driving millions bankrupt with his excessive environmental regulations and costly alternative energy policies. Which of course triggered a huge recession, which turned into a second Great Depression.....which solved the global warming problem because everyone was too depressed and concerned with just getting by to give a damn about what might be happening to the planet as a whole.

[skrable]

Originally Posted by Grandstander

... everyone was too depressed and concerned with just getting by to give a damn about what might be happening to the planet as a whole.

isn't that Bush's global warming plan?

[vtred]

Weekly "what if" fight match-up:

Abbott & Costello vs. Laurel & Hardy?

[Grandstander]

Originally Posted by skrable

isn't that Bush's global warming plan?

No, his plan was to distract attention by staging a really cool and popular war.

[Grandstander]

Originally Posted by vtred

Weekly "what if" fight match-up:

Abbott & Costello vs. Laurel & Hardy?

I have never been a huge fan of either of them, their comdey was slapstick/exasperation, two humor dynamics which I find seldom entertaining.

The exasperation part, it's what I think of as Snagglepuss level entertainment, someone does something which frustates someone else and the frustrated person has to do the Snyleywhiplash curses foiled again act. It's a thankless part, no actor, not even a toon actor, comes across looking good when doing it. You find it with James Bond villains, the adults in any teenage prank movie, the cops in any criminal comedy movie, the dumped fiance in romantic comedy movies......Ricky Ricardo, Hardy and Abbott, all played the same role over and over....oh no, look what you've done now...

So, lumping all those roles into one Snagglepuss fusion, we base our judgment on Costello vs Laurel. Stanley wins that one easily, he at least was rubber faced and could convey an array of emotions. Costello was a one note spit take guy who milked the same reaction 8 million times in assorted movies.

[bedir than average]

Ever read a worse alternative history than this?

Norman MacAfee: The Presidency of Al Gore, 2001-2009 - Politics on The Huffington Post

[Grandstander]

Originally Posted by bedir than average

Ever read a worse alternative history than this?

Norman MacAfee: The Presidency of Al Gore, 2001-2009 - Politics on The Huffington Post

All that is missing is the part where Al ascends to heaven at the end of his eight years. Well, that and the part where Al builds a solar powered time machine and goes back and prevents all historical errors from taking place.

[phenweigh]

Are you or have you ever been interested in women's shoes?

[Grandstander]

Originally Posted by phenweigh

Are you or have you ever been interested in women's shoes?

If I was, I would have gone with Imelda over Eva Peron.

You know, that's the sort of question where the answer is predictable in advance because it would be no either way. I would either have no actual interest, or if I did, I would lie about it rather than open up my private fetish world for the board. I mention all this by way of introducing another cause of mine....I am very much in favor of everyone minding their own sexual business to whatever degree is possible. I would prefer a world where we keep private sexual practices....private. We didn't need to know about Bill and Monica and the semen stained dress, what did any of that have to do with running the nation? The governor of NY just got run out of his job, not for anything having to do with his leadership of the state, but because of his private sexual life. Why are we so absorbed by this stuff? Why are we making it part of our test of leadership? JFK was a serial womanizer, Adolph Hitler...if he ever even had sex with that dull as dirt commoner Eva Braun, no one seems to know, but there was no one else, he was a model of fidelity. Stalin and Mao were both appparently something of the sexual pig, but had they been pure in that area, would that have redeemed them in the eyes of history? Was Jefferson any less of a statesman for his affair with one of his slaves? John Adams had a marvelous relationship with his wife Abigail, but do we wish to judge him on that or on his failed presidency?


Public disinterest in the sex lives of our politicians would have another great benefit.....it would put all of the sexual blackmailers out of business. If no one gave a damn about politician's sexual lives, then none would have to go to great lengths to conceal their practices, none could be blackmailed.

[phenweigh]

By we, do you mean we humans or we Americans?

[Grandstander]

Originally Posted by phenweigh

By we, do you mean we humans or we Americans?

Exactly.

[perfectstormhits]

Does my computer virus have a virus?

[Grandstander]

Originally Posted by perfectstormhits

Does my computer virus have a virus?

If your computer is functioning properly, then probably yes. Someone has hacked into your virus and disrupted it so that it can no longer vex all of your operations. It's a sign that you need to head toward the Grandstore and pick up a copy of our newest edition of GrandShield Firebomb 5000. Why Firebomb rather than Firewall? Grandshield is a new concept in computer security. The best defense is an aggressive offense, and rather than passively waiting for assaults on your hardrive, Grandshield mounts commando missions to seek out and destroy potential hackers and suspected pranksters. Any unauthorized attempt to communicate with your machine will trigger an instant response, converting that signal into a lethal return burst which causes the sender's computer to explode and burn. You're safe and he's one sorry hacker.

[skrable]

remember that button you told me never to push down in the lab?